As you know, I am battling PTSD and Schizoaffective Disorder, and now Peri-menopause.  Life has been difficult lately, because, I am having a lot of  horrible hot flashes, and heart palpitations, night sweats, etc.  I am losing weight also because I just don't feel like eating, I have no appetite.  So, I took a much-needed vacation.  And now, I feel really good.  It was precisely what I needed.  A very smart decision.
     I spent my vacation, getting together with friends, resting, and I visited my mother, in Maine.  Maine is 2 states away from me, so I took a bus up on Wednesday and came home on Saturday.
     To be honest, I think that Maine is a beautiful state, but, there is not much to do there, so I have no dreams of ever living there.  But my mother is there, and I am, deep-down crazy about my mother.
      Mama and I had a rough start.  She had me at 19, and found herself married to a sociopath who threatened to kill her. She left him, I mean, literally, escaped him, with me, a mere toddler, and fled from South Carolina back to her home in Massachusetts, with not much more, than me in her arms.  We were so poor, and she found herself in some really terrible relationships.  In the mean time, the courts said that I had to visit my father, who paid a despicable amount of child support, and he turned out to be disgustingly abusive towards me.  Over the years, my mother earned college degrees, as she too battled her past trauma and depression.  She  has evolved, over the years, into a wonderful mother.
     I realize now, that I haven't said a lot about my mother, in my blogs.  I think that I wanted to protect her privacy.  But she is a very important part of my life.   Mama, if you ever read my blogs, I want you to know that I love you so much.