About 3 hours after I woke up this morning, my lungs hurt, and my right ear ached.  "Here we go again", I thought to myself.  Fortunately, I did not have to go to work today, so I made an appointment with my physician.  She told me that my asthma was exacerbated, and that my ear hurt because I was congested.  It was probably caused by allergies, the air quality  (it has been extremely humid and hot), or possibly, I was coming down with a cold.  She increased the dosage of my steroid inhaler, and told me to use my Albuteral several times a day, and to take allergy medication.
    It occurred to me, this evening, while talking to a friend, that I have a lot of physical ailments, including, asthma, arthritis, GERD, & Diabetes.  This could be a hereditary thing, but I think that it is no coincidence, that my body suffers, because my mind suffers.  The more stress a person is under, the more their body becomes sick.  Do other people feel the way that I do?
    I also have noticed that my doctors have to work especially hard to heal me, to find causes and cures for illnesses.  And sometimes they focus on my mind and less on my body.  Maybe they feel that my mind is the central computer to my body, and The Master Of All Things Physical.  What do you think?

     I am over my bronchitis now, and no longer taking Prednisone.  The last few weeks were very scary for me, to say the least.  I was sick with bronchitis & asthma, and the Prednisone that I was taking, really messed with my mind.  I was extremely depressed and having suicidal thoughts, while taking it.  I am now, feeling much better, physically and emotionally.  For this, I am very thankful.
     I often wonder how many people on Earth, are extremely thankful, for everything that is given to them.I know that when I am feeling unstable, it is very hard for me to be appreciative and thankful of what life gives me.  But, when my mind is healthy, I am so thankful for my health, my sanity, my life.
     I wonder, often, if I were totally healthy, if I would have the same type of appreciation for the joys of life.
I am thankful for: my amazing husband, who will never give up on me; my wonderful mother, who has been with me through the worst of times; for my awesome friends who are so supportive and kind; for my crazy little, deaf cat, named Julie; for my cozy, little apartment that feels so safe; for my job, because they have always accommodated me, when I needed to go into the hospital, or needed to take a medical leave; I am thankful for having food to eat; and for being a citizen of the USA, where I have freedom to write, freedom to be happy, and excellent medical care.
      Most of all, I am thankful, when God gives me a normal day, where I am able to function normally, and be at my best.  I've said it before, but on these days, I feel like a little kid, at Disneyworld.  Life is so joyous then.  I hope that everyone else, on Earth, feels the same way!

     I have been taking Prednisone for my bronchitis / asthma, and I think that it is having a negative impact on my mind.  I have been feeling depressed and edgy for days, and this morning I was having thoughts of harming myself.  They were brief, involuntary thoughts. In my mind's picture I saw myself, harming myself.
I felt scared, confused, and overwhelmed.  I haven't felt that way since my last hospitalization, which was about a year and a half ago.
     I have come a long way, over the past year and a half though.  I would never act on  suicidal thoughts now.  I really want to live.
     So, I called my physician and explained to the nurse that I was concerned about the fact that I was feeling so miserable and having scary thoughts.  My doctor decided to taper it so tomorrow will be my last day taking it.  They will also inform my psychiatrist.  They also insisted that I go to the hospital, if I continue to feel that way.
      I think that in the future, I will need a different medication, other than Prednisone, if my asthma acts up.
And I feel some relief knowing that tomorrow will be my last day taking it.

#68

     Right now, I'm battling bronchitis and asthma, so my body is sore and tired, but my mind is doing well.   I had been worried about the approaching, hot, summer months, because they bring back bad memories and flashbacks.
     I wrote about it last summer.  Basically, I talked about how spending the summer with my twisted, perverted father, during my childhood years has haunted me.  This summer seems different though.  I feel much happier than I did in past summers.  The weather has been extremely hot and oppressive, but it hasn't really triggered me yet.  Thank you, Lord, for bringing me peace!
     I don't know if other people with mental illness go through this also, but I have noticed, through my life, that I tend to get physically ill, a lot more than my healthy peers.  Personally, I think it is because my body spends so much time fighting off the stresses of PTSD and Schizoaffective Disorder, that it has little energy to fight off physical illnesses.  I have diabetes, high cholesterol, GERD, asthma, and I used to have a lot of migraines.  I tend to get colds a lot, which often leads to bronchitis, and other minor illnesses.
     I am very curious if other people with mental illnesses have this problem, of having a lot of physical illnesses as well.  Please feel free to give me feedback!